My boyfriend is going to kill himself. He's going to put a gun to his head unless I find a way to stop him. I don't know what has driven him to this. He said it was the combination of daily stress and monumental responsibility. I say that's a load of crap. He's just taking the easy way out. Suicide is an easy escape. Blowing your brains away isn't that difficult. You just pull a trigger, and you're done. No long goodbye. No last hug. Just a bang and a dead body, and it's all over.
My boyfriend is a coward. He can't handle it, so he's throwing it all away. I can't let him give up this easily. I can't. That's why I'm writing him a letter. I'm unable to talk to him without breaking down and crying, and that doesn't help the situation, so I'm choosing to put things down on paper this time. This letter has to help him. It has to.
Give me a reason to live, he told me once. Give me one good reason, Maria.
Oh, I'll give you more than one good reason, Michael. I'll give you hundreds if I have to, but for now I'll just give you ten.
And so the letter begins . . .
Reasons Why Michael Should Live:
1. He has really great hair. If he killed himself, that great hair would be missing. People wouldn't be able to walk down the street and comment on Michael Guerins ever-changing hairstyles, because he wouldn't be around to display them. His hair only lives if he lives, and that hair cannot be lost. That would just be wrong.
2. He is a valuable and loyal customer to Bargain Mart. Without Michael Guerin's constant purchases of bad clothing and horrendous grooming products, Bargain Mart would go out of business. Then the only place to shop in Roswell would be the hardware store. (Sick!) Speaking of the hardware store, it would go out of business, too.
3. Mr. Crulick loves to yell at him during class. Whether its for sleeping or not turning in homework or being in a pissed-off mood, Michael always gives the teacher a reason to send him to the office. Without Michael's bad educational behavior, the rest of us would get yelled at and sent to the office much more often. Now that's not really fair, is it?
4. He makes great Italian food. Italian food would go out of style without Michael Guerin around to give it some oomph. Spaghetti would be nothing special. Lasagna would taste bland. Who knows? Italian food may even become obsolete without the best Italian cook in the world.
5. He owns a great motorbike. If he wasn't here to ride it, it would probably be sold to some other person, probably some ten year-old kid who can't even sit on it without falling off. A beautiful source of transportation like that can't be given to a clueless kid! That needs to remain in Michael's possession for sure.
Okay, I'm done with the comical. Onto the serious . . .
6. He's funny. He doesn't know that he's funny, but he is. He's the most hilarious when he's confused about something. When we're out on a date, he doesn't know what to do or what to say, and it really cracks me up. If Michael's not around to be confused, then who's going to make me laugh?
7. He's sexy. I know this doesnt sound like a serious reason, but it is. Physical qualities are very important in a relationship, and Michael has some very nice physical qualities. Nice hands. Nice lips. Nice . . . okay, getting off track. The point is, I'm attracted to Michael. VERY attracted. What if I'm never attracted to anyone else like I am to him? That's not fair to either of us.
8. He's a great friend. Before we realized we had feelings for each other, we realized that we were going to be best friends, even though we argue about everything. I can tell him things, and he'll never hold it against me; and he can do the same. We trust each other, and we care about each other, and we know each other better than anyone else does.
9. He'll be a great father someday. I've seen the way he is around kids. I can tell that he loves them, even though he'll never admit it. Sometimes he's like a big kid himself. That's why his children will love him so much. He'll try to be their hero. He'll try to save them from all dangers, and he will succeed because he is Michael Guerin.
10. I love him. He doesn't know it because I've never told him, but my love for him is all I have. It's who I am. I love him in every way one person can love another, and if he goes away, then I will never love anyone else ever again. I'll never meet such a funny, sexy guy who's a great friend and who will be a great father. I'll never meet another Michael, because there isn't another Michael. He's the one and only, the real thing; and even though he thinks he's worthless, I think he's everything.
. . . and so ends the letter. I'll put it in a nice envelope and decorate it with little hearts and smiley faces, just to be stupid. I'll slip it into his geometry book and wait for him to find it. I'll see the tears in his eyes when he reads it, even though he always tries to hide them. I'll laugh at the shock on his face when he reads reason number ten.
Most of all, I'll pray. I'll pray that he decides to live. If he doesn't want to live for himself, I can only hope that he wants to live for me.
Please, Michael . . . please live.
Story Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.